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NEXT TIME SELF-DOUBT STOPS YOU, REMEMBER THIS

Do you ever get stuck or consumed by self doubt?

No matter how comfortable we are in our own skin, chances are we all have those moments. 

And that’s completely normal. It’s almost impossible to eradicate our feelings of self-doubt. Building that confidence is a lifelong practice. And it’s not something we can accomplish alone.

I was so happy to have been introduced to Melissa Mills earlier this year. She works globally as a speaker, retreat facilitator, medium and mentor. We had a very open hearted conversation and she helped me shake off a few barriers I had.

When I spoke with Melissa, I was feeling stuck and I needed to get through my barriers. I was focused on my to do lists and not listening to what fills my soul. I wasn’t taking enough moments throughout the day to stop and just be. I was mainly living on auto-pilot and eager to live more in the present but didn’t how to untangle myself out of that rut. I wanted to be more present with my children, husband, family, friends and most of all myself.

Melissa is known for her ‘flip the mindset” method. And she gave me the nudge I needed. You’ll love her honest and insightful interview…

Melissa is offering a special 20% discount for Balancing Act readers with the code ‘balancingact20’ for any of her services. To read more about what she offers, go to https://melissamills.co.nz/services/

 

Karina: What can we do as mothers do avoid that self-doubt?

Melissa: Self-doubt in my eyes is choosing fear over love.  We all have that initial gut reaction or instinct, and then we question it, try to make sense of it, that’s when doubt steps in.  That initial gut reaction or instinct that’s your higher self guiding you to what the best outcome or step is for you, and we must learn to trust it, for that is when we choose love over fear. 

As mothers we have to understand that our children chose us.  Out of all the people in the world, they chose us as the very best option to guide them and allow them to emerge as the individuals they came here to be. 

So being yourself and not the kind of mother you think your children want you to be is the first thing I recommend you free yourself from. That mum guilt does not serve anyone.

We also need to realise that we all have self-doubt, and that it’s part of our humanness, and it does serve its purpose for our survival.  

The thing with doubt is that we want to acknowledge when it shows up, but we don’t want to give it momentum.  When we do give self-doubt momentum, it’s the thing that cripples us, and truly takes away the beauty of life. 

Learn to recognise your self-doubt, give it a name and have a conversation with it.

For example “Hi Natalie, I appreciate you showing up in my life and wanting to keep me safe.  I love and appreciate you, but right now I’ve got this and I set you free.” Doing this simple technique will really assist you in no longer choosing to occupy the self-doubt, and you’ll be so much more confident and guided by your higher power.  

 

Karina: What can we do to help align ourselves to what is true to us?

Melissa: I always say there will never be another you as there is right now in all of Earth’s existence.  You came here to make this world better than how you came into it with your certain skills, talents and abilities that you chose to have. 

You are here to bring your own unique way of interpreting unconditional love and sharing that with the world.  Now usually this is something you are truly passionate about and comes naturally to you. 

Connecting in with yourself is important, and meditation is the key. Even taking time out to breathe while closing your eyes for 5 minutes and listen to your mind and your heart. 

You can also journal, setting the intention to your higher self to guide you on how to live your life authentically and on purpose. 

Do what feels good to you without feeling you have to justify yourself to anyone.  This is the kind of thing I love working on with my clients during a soul alignment session. 

 

Karina: In our initial conversation, you reminded me that as mothers, we tend to not allow ourselves enough joy. Can you explain the importance of including more joy for us in our daily lives?

Melissa: Joy is the highest emotion we can experience, it’s right up there with love, gratitude and abundance. 

We need to be aiming for joy, that doesn’t mean we need to be in joy all the time, but we do our best to strive for it.  Joy simply means choosing your bliss, what lights you up.  It’s important to note that every 17 seconds you are sending your request to the Universe with how you feel, so if you’re feeling sad, you’re sending the request to the universe that you want to keep feeling sad, so getting into the state of joy is really important if we want to live our best lives.  

I talk about the hot chocolate with marshmallow moment to help my clients get back into the vibration of joy.  Now the hot chocolate with marshmallow can be absolutely anything, it could be a song, it could be a person, it could be a memory, just anything that when you think of it, it instantly makes you feel happy and giddy, you know like a kid at Christmas. 

I also like to have the word joy as a visual reminder whether that be on the wall or as my screensaver.  You can also do a joy jar in which you can pick from once a month with something that you can do to add more joy in your life.  It could be, buying yourself flowers, going to a second hand shop and buying a book etc…

 

Karina: I keep on reminding myself to not wait until “I’m ready” to do whatever I want to do. Showing up before you’re ready is so important and reminding ourselves that we’re actually worthy of an abundant life. Can you expand more on the fear vs curiosity aspect of our mind?

Melissa: Fear is the robber of your joy and dreams.  It is my understanding that fear isn’t real, it’s a human made concept created to keep us disconnected from our magnificence, our power and infinite potential. 

Fear is good, like the self-doubt, we want to acknowledge it but not give it momentum.  Every single one of you is worthy of having everything you ever dreamed of.  In fact it’s your divine right. 

You wouldn’t have these wants, dreams and desires if they weren’t yours to have, they simply wouldn’t come into your awareness.  One of the best things I have done which has helped me a lot recently is the work of Marisa Peer, and the simple task of writing the words “I am enough” on the mirror at eye level.  Since a lot of the time we don’t feel worthy, seeing ourselves as enough transforms all of that self-sabotage and self-doubt that stands in the way of you living your best life. 

 

Karina: As busy mothers, we sometimes loose that connection with our inner voice that knows best and we seek that outer approval and worry too much about “what people will think”. Can you give us tips on how to feel that connection again?

Melissa: The best tip I have is to give yourself the time to meditate.  It truly is the answer and key to everything.  Meditation to me is about reconnecting with myself.  So either meditate 15 minutes to the sound of air conditioning (which you can find on youtube), a guided meditation or a meditation with mantras. 

By having a daily meditation practice you will be guided from your own being as to what you can do to reconnect to you. 

It honestly doesn’t matter what anyone thinks of you, as usually this is only a reflection of how they feel about themselves. 

It only matters what you think about yourself, remember “I am enough”.  Write out a list of 10-20 affirmations about what you now choose to believe about yourself. 

For example

  • “I choose to believe that I am loved and appreciated by my family and friends.” 
  • “I choose to believe that I am worthy of having family holidays every year.”

Read them out everyday and let these statements of worthiness become your new benchmark for life. 
Here is to your beautiful unfolding.  

 

Hi, I'm Karina

I help women reconnect with themselves through productive, nurturing and inspiring conversations with leaders and experts in well-being.

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Gut Health with Katrina Browne

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TIME TO HONOUR OURSELVES

Playing around with my new home barre 💃🏻🤩 Playing around with my new home barre 💃🏻🤩
Barre by Balancing Act has officially launched! T Barre by Balancing Act has officially launched!
This has always been a dream of mine for many years. 
I thought I would give you a little background of how this all happened. 
My passion as a young girl was always dance and movement. I danced all throughout my school years. I even considered studying dance at university. But I injured my knee in my last year of school and I was probably a bit scared of going the “non conventional way” and chose to study business and marketing instead. 
10 years ago while I was pregnant with our first child and living in Dubai, I decided to study the principals of Pilates and the anatomy of the body. I thought that could be a good back up if I chose to leave the corporate world when I have our baby and pursue my dream. 
But moving to a new country, growing our family and a busy life meant that it wasn’t the right time for me. I still participated in all sorts of classes and especially during Covid - I became obsessed with moving my body daily for my sanity. I got into a rhythm of moving my body mindfully, it was like a moving meditation for me. I couldn’t go a day without it. 
Last year, I took adult ballet lessons with some friends at my daughter’s dance school @chandlerdanceacademy 🩰 We even had a little part in the end of year dance show. It was so much fun but most of all it reminded me of my passion for dance and movement and how it’s just in me!
Early this year, I finally made the decision to go ahead and take the barre course with the fabulous @themethodnz. Best decision ever! 
Once I completed the course, I practised on my lovely friends who showered me with encouraging words and positive energy! I got my confidence up, got that fire in my belly again and now I can’t stop 🔥 
I can’t thank my family and friends enough for all the support!
And of course this ties in with Balancing Act’s mission, with my passion for wellness and empowering women to discover or rediscover their strength and confidence. 
So I’m now proud to say that I am a qualified Barre instructor and ready to share my passion and energy with you!
For class schedule, check out link in my bio. 
See you at the barre 👯‍♀️😊
I’m always so excited every time I pick a topic I’m always so excited every time I pick a topic for @balancingactnz urban retreats. 
I love sharing the knowledge with you and introducing you to my amazing lineup of instructors and speakers. 
I’m also usually equally passionate about every theme, but I have to say I might have been extra excited with the last one!
Mindful movement + balance lifestyle is essential to my overall physical and mental health and I had to share all the nuggets of wisdom with you!
Thank you to the incredible Anne from @core__balance. With a last minute turn of events, Anne kindly accepted to teach the movement segment of the retreat, And what a treat it was for us! She was amazing 🤩 
Thank you 
@katrinabrowne.naturopath who’s depth of knowledge continues to amaze me! She gave us tons of actionable insights! 
We had the most wonderful bunch of women, it was so nice to see the energy that a pack of strong women can create!
A huge thank you to the incredible @olyas_kitchen with her wholesome and delicious food. 
And to @omyogastudionz for your zen and peaceful venue! 
Thank you so much for the beautiful brands who contributed to the goodie bags
@precision.skin 
@urban_herbalist_nz 
@goodmagazinenz 
@katrinabrowne.naturopath 
All brands that I love and believe in. 
I look forward connecting again to create more of these urban retreats - some space and time just for you - to prioritise your wellbeing. 
A massive thank you to @dimeek for capturing the energy and special moments from the retreat. You are amazing 🤩
Prepping goodie bags for @balancingactnz urban ret Prepping goodie bags for @balancingactnz urban retreat this Saturday. 
It’s filled with wholesome goodies and discount codes from brands I LOVE! ❤️ 🛍️ 
Thank you to my goodie bag sponsors including @precision.skin @urban_herbalist_nz @goodmagazinenz @katrinabrowne.naturopath 
Grab the last few spots from the link in my bio. 
See you on the 25th of March (11am 2:30pm) at @omyogastudionz for a morning and early afternoon of HITT Pilates, and a chat with @katrinabrowne.naturopath and myself - kind of like a live podcast with the bonus of you being able to ask anything you’d like! It’s also always a great opportunity to connect. And you’ll get to try some amazing low inflammation food beautifully made by @olyas_kitchen 😋 
So much to share! We can’t wait to see you! xx
I’m so excited to share @katrinabrowne.naturopat I’m so excited to share @katrinabrowne.naturopath knowledge with you this coming Saturday!
Apart from discussing gut health and inflammation, we will also dive into “cycle synching”. 
Women are cyclic beings and when we tune into our menstrual cycle — we get a deeper understanding of ourself and your body. 
We will be breaking down what foods to eat and how to exercise so you feel your best during each phase of your cycle! And we will understand how women can actually use monthly periods as a productivity tool!
We will also touch on what happens to your cycle in the early perimenopause phase and beyond + actionable tools to keep you feeling good in your body and mind!
Now I know some might think it sounds daunting or all a bit idealistic but once you receive the information, you will realise how empowering it is to know all of this! 
Can’t wait for you connect with Katrina and learn more!
See you on Saturday 🌺
It’s funny when I started to get into the wellne It’s funny when I started to get into the wellness space, I was a new mother entering that early motherhood phase. 
Seven months after our first child, we moved to NZ and I craved connection with other mothers but also knowledge. 
I was curious about the psychological and physiological changes that come with this phase in our life. 
And I noticed many other women feeling the same and craving that growth which is why I created Balancing Act workshops and urban retreats. A space for learning, self reflection and connection. 
Fast forward to now, as I am approaching 40 (not quite yet, one year to go 😉) it’s yet another phase! 
So with that in mind, I also think of my beautiful clients and their changing needs and concerns. 
The beauty of this journey is that we are doing it together and I want to continue giving you helpful insights and tips so you can keep feeling your best as we grow together. 
I’m so grateful for the amazing speakers and instructors I have gotten to know over the years and the collaboration between us is what also makes this journey even better. 
Check out my latest workshop in link in bio about gut health and inflammation. It’s a goodie 😊 ❤️
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